Quill, Parchment, & Ink

Title: Painting the Town
Characters: Hardison-Parker, Eliot
Fandom: Leverage
Summary: Parker wants to make some improvements to her home and needs a little help.
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Up through aired episodes of Season 3
Warnings: Not really? Everyone was pretty well behaved.
Disclaimer: No one recognizable belongs to me; mores the pity.
Author's Note: This is a very, very, very, VERY belated Christmas present for serenelystrange . Yes, obviously this is a major fail on my part. She gave me the prompt “Hardison, Parker, yellow” and this is how my wacky brain translated it. We should all be glad my brain did not decide to go with the weird Buffy thought that went through my head at first. I started this back in December…so I had a bit of an issue when I went to pick it back up recently (after a specific episode aired). I was informed by the giftee that I should “pull a Joss”, but I have a major issue against doing that…so I did some editing…and this is what I came up with…Enjoy! Special thanks to palm__tree who looked this over before I posted and to kaitlia777  and starhawk_writes  for their comments and assistance. I did not take all of kaitlia777 ’s advice because it did not work for the story…I hope y’all will excuse my handwaving.


Hardison opened his eyes, lifting his head from where it had fallen onto his keyboard when he drifted off. Rubbing his face, trying to erase the marks from the keys, he stretched; wincing as his back cracked. Turning, he jumped as he spied Parker crouched on the end table next to him. “Don’t do that!” he yelped as he tumbled backwards, grabbing for his laptop as it started to slide.

“Do what?” she asked, tilting her head to the side.

“Startle me. Stare at me. Geez, Parker, how did you get in here?”

She grinned. “Window.”

Hardison shook his head. It just wasn’t worth berating Parker. She honestly didn’t understand that what she was doing was wrong. And it didn’t work to lock her out or set an alarm because she could circumvent any he had set so far. “Did you need something?” he asked, setting his computer on the table and standing up.

“I need your help,” she announced as he made his way into the kitchen.

Hardison paused in the act of pulling an orange soda out of his cupboard. “Say what?”

“I need your help.”

“Um…okay,” Hardison stuttered, missing the counter and just catching his bottle before it shattered on the floor. “With what? Nate said no stealing here.”

Parker pouted. “I know and that’s really not fair. I mean I said I’d put it back. But no, no stealing. I wanna paint my apartment.”

He stared at her in confusion. “Wouldn’t Eliot be a better choice? I mean ya know with the muscles and the manly knowledge thing and all. It just seems a more logical choice.”

Parker shook her head, her blonde ponytail bouncing. “No because Eliot would be all growly and make me do it right. I don’t want to do it right, I just want to paint.”

“Okay so do you have the paint?” When she shook her head, he responded, “So that’s like our first move. He paused looking at her. “Any idea where to get it?”

She bit her lip and shook her head. “No. Don’t you?”

“Not a clue, but I know who we’re gonna call.” Hardison scooped up his cell and dialed the number of the one person he knew would have the information they’d need.

“What?” a familiar voice snapped in answer.

“Hey. I didn’t like wake you or anything, did I? Cause…I can like google what I need or call Nate or…ya know never mind. I’ll get my information somewhere else,” Hardison babbled.

“Hardison. Hardison!” Eliot yelled. “What the hell are you talking about?” he asked more calmly when Hardison took a breath.

“Parker wants to paint her apartment and I figured you’d know where to get the paint,” Hardison explained. “Thought you could give us suggestions.”

There was silence on the other end for a few moments as Eliot processed the request. "How is it you can re-task a spy satellite, but don't know where to get paint?"

“Cause that’s what I have you for?” Hardison hazarded.

Something that sounded distinctly like a thud came over the line. “We’ve discussed this. It’s the same reason you learned to defend yourself. I’m not always gonna be around to haul your carcass out of trouble.”

“This isn’t trouble. This is painting Parker’s place!” Hardison protested.

“And she didn’t come to me, why?”

“She um didn’t want to bother you?” Hardison suggested. “I don’t know, Eliot. I just know she’s here.” He turned to look and noticed Parker poking at his computer. “Hey! Don’t touch that!” He glared at her until she turned away and stuck her hands in her pocket. “Could you give me some suggestions?”

“Okay. Yeah. Home Depot, Lowes, Benjamin Moore, Wal-Mart. No not the last one. Just…no. You know you’re going to need paint brushes, rollers, drop cloths, paint trays, and edging tape, too, right?”

“Why would we need all that?”

“Well you aren’t planning to finger paint, are you? Look why don’t I meet you at Home Depot? I’ll help you get what you need and then you two can go do whatever it is you want.”

“Par…Park…” Hardison took a deep breath. “Parker is concerned that you’ll make her do it ‘right’,” he said in a rush.

Another sound came over the line and Hardison decided he didn’t want to attempt to identify it. “Assure Parker that I won’t make her do anything,” Eliot finally said. “But I ain’t lettin’ you two loose in Home Depot. I’ll meet y’all there in thirty minutes.”

Hardison turned around to discover Parker had clambered up on top of his window ledge and was hanging there, examining something. He groaned in exasperation. “Parker, get down here. Eliot’s gonna meet us at Home Depot.” At her look, he explained, “He’s just gonna help us pick things out and then he said he’ll let you do what you want. So no worries about doing it ‘right’.”

“He’ll let me do what I want?” Parker asked as she swung down and landed gently on her feet.

“Yeah, just wants to make sure you get what you need. You ready?”

Parker nodded, bouncing briefly on her toes. “Can I drive?”

“No!” Hardison managed to grab the keys before she could, shooing her out the door ahead of him.

* * * * * * * *

Hardison circled the lot a couple of times, finally finding Eliot leaning against his truck; sunglasses on and hands shoved in faded jeans’ pockets. A cranberry red shirt clung to his torso and was drawing admiring looks from the women wandering. There was no reaction from the man in question, although he turned his head as Hardison pulled in next to him. He looked over the top of his sunglasses and drawled, “Did you get lost?”

“No, I did not get lost. I have GPS!” Hardison retorted as he got out of his car, motioning for Parker to do the same.

Parker skipped around the vehicle, throwing herself into Eliot’s arms. “We’re gonna paint my place!” she exclaimed.

Eliot smiled fondly. “Yeah, sweetheart, Hardison told me. Come on, let’s get your supplies.” He paused as she started to bounce in the direction of the store. “You did bring money, right?” he asked warily.

Parker stopped, looking at him with a puzzled expression. “Why do I need money? We can…”

“No, Parker,” Eliot explained patiently. “We cannot just steal what you need. If nothing else Nate told us no stealing.” He sighed. “Never mind…I’ll…”

“I got it covered, man,” Hardison broke in. “I figured she wouldn’t think of it. I’ve got a credit card we can use with a cover id if needed. We ready?”

Eliot just gave him a look like he would never be ready for this and pointed him in the direction of the store. Parker had already skipped ahead of them and was making a beeline for one of the flatbed carts, calling over her shoulder, “Look, Hardison, they have little mini-scooters. That people can ride on!” She hopped onto one of them, but then seemed confused for a moment on how to make it go. Putting one foot off, she tried to push it forward but it just turned in a half-circle.

Hardison moved towards her, but Eliot was quicker; lifting her off the flatbed and directing her towards a regular cart. “We don’t need one of those, sweetheart,” he said in a gentle voice. “We’re not gonna get anything that big. Here you can push the cart.” Guiding her in the right direction, he got her moving into the store.

As soon as they entered, they were immediately accosted by a young lady who smiled brightly at Eliot. “Hey. Welcome to Home Depot. Is there anything I can help you with?”

Hardison opened his mouth to point out there were two other people with Eliot when the man in question responded. “Thanks, but I think my sister and I can find everything we need. We’ll be sure to ask for you, Candy,” he answered after a glance at her name tag, “if we need anything.” Grabbing Hardison’s arm, he pulled him away, pushing Parker in the same direction.

“I can’t believe you!” Hardison started as soon as they were out of earshot. “Flirting with that girl. Telling her Parker’s your sister.”

“Would you rather have to explain her lack of last name? Or first name?” Eliot asked in a low voice, keeping one eye on Parker as she darted ahead of the two men. When Hardison didn’t respond, Eliot nodded. “Yeah, I thought not.” Striding ahead, he caught up to Parker, who was eyeing the shelves. “No, Parker,” he said, “you cannot climb the shelves.”

Parker turned to him with a pout. “But, Eliot,” she started.

“We’re trying not to draw attention to ourselves,” he pointed out, his voice still the same even tone he’d been using with Hardison. “Now, come on. Let’s get what y’all need so you can go paint.” He took her arm, guiding her in the right direction and listing the things they’d need.

“I still don’t know why we need all those things,” Hardison protested as he followed along.

“I thought the idea was I know what I’m doing.” Eliot turned to face the other man for a moment. “If you don’t want my help though…”

“No.” Hardison waved his hand. “Just don’t make Parker feel bad. She’s afraid you’ll make her do it right.”

“Yeah, I don’t get…” Eliot trailed off as he noticed the blond was missing. “Where’d she go?”

Hardison whipped his head around, looking in all directions. “She was right here a second ago.”

Eliot pointed back the way they’d come. “You go that way. I’ll go the other. Call me if you find her.” Abandoning the cart, he hurried down the aisle. He made two quick turns before screams and noise attracted his attention. Picking up speed, he burst around the corner, skidding to a halt as he spied Parker clinging like a limpet to the rolls of carpet. She was three-quarters of the way up and from this angle, Eliot couldn’t tell what she had anchored herself to, but at least four employees stood below her along with more customers than he was going to take time to count. Brushing his hair back, he strode forward, trying to look concerned. “Oh thank god, you found her,” he said approaching the first employee.

The girl looked over her shoulder. “You know her, sir?” she asked.

He plastered on his most concerned look as he glanced up at Parker. “She’s my little sister. Sorry, she’s really fast. I turned my back for one second and she took off.” He cupped his hands. “Parker, sweetie, hang on, okay? Someone’ll get you down.”

Parker unhooked one hand, causing gasps to pour from her audience and waving at Eliot. “Hi, Eliot. I didn’t climb the shelves!”

“Eliot, I couldn’t…” Hardison’s voice came from behind him. “Oh, you found her.” He paused for a moment, studying the predicament and causing Eliot to glance over his shoulder at the computer man. “Well that’s a new one.”

“Not helping, Hardison,” Eliot growled.

The employee was glancing between the three Leverage consultants, not understanding why the men weren’t panicking. Parker meanwhile was grinning down at her teammates, obviously quite proud of her free climb. “If you don’t think it will freak her out, we can get someone with a ladder up there to help her down,” she offered.

The two men exchanged glances. “Ladder?” Hardison questioned and Eliot shook his head.

“Easier just to tell her to climb down,” he murmured. “Rather than having her decide to jump or somethin’.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Hardison agreed. “You talking to her or me?”

“You better since she’s so worried about me doin’ things right,” Eliot responded, backing off slightly. He took the employee by the arm, guiding her away. “She’s got a really good head for heights,” he assured the girl, motioning for the other people to back up as Hardison moved forward. “Our friend’ll just encourage her to come back to ground.”

“You aren’t worried about her falling?” the girl questioned.

He shook his head, watching as Hardison began to coax Parker down. “No, not really. We had a bit of a disagreement when we got here.” Out of the corner of his eye he noticed Parker start down towards the floor and once he was sure she was on the way to earth, he turned back towards the employee. “So she did something that would make her feel safe. We’ll just keep a closer eye on her.” He nodded as he noticed Parker had reached the ground and was talking to Hardison. “See, no harm, no foul.”

Parker walked up to him, her head down and her lower lip trembling. He tried not to smile at the acting she wouldn’t have attempted even a couple of months ago. The employees trailed along behind her; making sure that she didn’t head back up the carpet rolls. “Sweetheart, I’m not mad at you,” he assured her, “but let’s keep your feet on the ground for now.”

“I just wanted to see if I could do it,” she said in a small voice.

For a moment, Eliot didn’t know how to answer that. “Well, now you know you can do it,” he pointed out. “So let’s not disturb the people anymore. They don’t need their lives to be any more exciting today.” Leaning over, he whispered in her ear, eliciting a grin from her.

“Okay, Eliot,” she agreed. “Come on, Hardison.” She grabbed the other man’s hand and dragged him towards the large sign that said ‘PAINT’.

Hardison looked over his shoulder, to see a slow grin spread across the hitter’s face. “What did you say to her, man?” he asked.

Eliot’s grin widened as he jammed his hands in his pockets and strolled after the two. “Nothing you need to worry about. You’re the one she called for help.”

“But…but you said...you were going to help us get stuff,” Hardison protested as Parker hauled him along the aisle. And damn the girl was a hell of a lot stronger than she looked; he couldn’t break her grip and digging in hadn’t slowed her down in the least. By the look on his face, Eliot was enjoying this just a little too much also.

Eliot snagged a cart that was standing empty near-by and began to dump supplies into it, trailing after his two younger teammates. “I am helping,” he replied. “Go pick out the colors. Have someone mix them up for y’all.”

Hardison turned as he felt the hand Parker had been holding him with drop away. “Hey, girl, where are you…?” he trailed off as he caught sight of her stock still in front of the wall of paint chips.

Parker turned wide blue eyes to him. “Look it all the colors!”

He nodded. It was moments like these that he realized how different their childhoods had been although they both grew up in foster care. “You can pick whatever color you want, Parker. Or more than one if you want.”

“How do we get the paint from these onto the walls though?” she asked as she reached out and fingered one of the colors.

“Well, you pick the ones you want and we take them over there.” He turned them around so they could see the counter where two men stood with cans and the machines and the other items needed to mix the paint. “Then they’ll mix it up to make the right color.”

“But how do they know what color to make?”

Hardison plucked one of the cards, choosing randomly and flipped it over, showing her the numbers on the back. “Each number tells them how much of the primary color to put in so that they tint the white to the shade you pick. Then they shake it up and we take it home.”

Parker grinned and began to pick through the colors, choosing one from this and one from that until she had a stack of about fifty. “I can have all of these?”

“Well I don’t think you need that many colors for one room or even your whole place.” Hardison noticed she had picked mostly one color and held up a chip from that selection. “Why don’t you pick a couple of these? Or you can pick a different color for each section?”

“I have one big section,” she reminded him after a moment.

Hardison considered that for a few minutes. “How about this then?” he suggested. “We’ll do two walls one color and two walls another and then do the trim a third color.” He glanced at her stack of choices, noticing that she had picked mostly yellows and chose three that went together. “Now we um…” He glanced around trying to figure out what they needed to do next.

He was saved by Eliot who stopped next to them, handing over a gallon of base paint. “Ya take this and have them mix the colors. You’ll probably need a couple gallons of each color for the walls and at least a gallon for the trim.”

“Why so much?” Parker asked as Hardison followed his directions and carried the paint chips over to the counter.

“You have a large place, sweetheart,” Eliot replied, “with a lot of wall space and more wall space takes more paint.”

Parker tilted her head to the side for a moment, then seemed to decide it didn’t matter and skipped over to where Hardison was waiting for the paint to finish mixing. She rested her head on his shoulder and asked, “Is it ready?”

Hardison squeaked, jumping away from the blonde. “Where? What? Hey! Where did you come from?”

She giggled. “I was behind you.”

“Well, don’t do that!” he snapped. “And yes, they’re almost done. Where did…?” He contained another yelp as Eliot appeared beside them. “Would you stop doing that?!” he demanded.

Eliot looked at him like he was crazy, but took the paint that had been mixed and swung it into the cart, watching carefully as the rest of the paint was mixed. Parker seemed intrigued by the process and making sure that she didn’t vault over the counter was his other project.

As Eliot swung the gallons into the cart, Parker petted each can, cooing happily to it. It served to distract her from attempting to vault the counter which he appreciated.

When one of the men gave them a dirty look, Eliot leveled death glare number seven at him. It was the one he reserved for minor nuisances and street junkies, but lethal enough that the man blanched in response and hurried to finish their order.

“Do we have everything, Eliot?” she asked as he set the last can in the cart, bouncing lightly on her feet.

A glance over the cart brought a quick nod in answer. “This is it, sweetheart,” Eliot confirmed. “And I’m done. This is all I promised to do.” With a wave to them both, he wandered in the direction of the exit, ducking the offered assistance of the Home Depot employees.

Parker looked at Hardison; her dark blue eyes wide over the full cart. “Now what?”

“Now we go pay for all this and then we truck it to your place.” Nudging her, he got them moving in the right direction. “Ready to do this?”

A quick smile flittered across her features before she ducked her head, nodding a little. “Can we do it today?”

“I don’t see why we can’t start,” Hardison replied. He handed the credit card he’d picked over to the cashier, smirking at Parker as it was quickly approved. “Cause that’s what I do, mama,” he told her with a wink.

“So what do we need to do?” Parker asked as they began to load the supplies into the car. When they were finished, the trunk and half the back seat was full.

“Well,” Hardison said, before beginning to ramble on about what he could discover googling when they got to her warehouse.

Parker quickly inputted the code that would grant them access. They hauled their supplies inside and then Parker disappeared, scrambling up into the rafters.

Hardison looked around, trying to figure out how they were going to light the vast space. He was just about ready to call out to her that they need to go find some very large spotlights, when the warehouse was suddenly flooded with it. As he blinked in the sudden brightness, the sound of a rappelling line made him back up. Only absolute certainty that the sound came from Parker made him stand his ground.

She was grinning from ear to ear when she landed just a few steps from him. She bounced lightly on the balls of her feet, grinning widely at him. “We can start now?” she asked.

“Yeah, I was gonna check on-line. Google it and stuff. See what we need to do. And see what we needed all these supplies for. See what all the things Eliot made us buy are for. And maybe make some plans and see where we should start…see if we should do things…” Hardison trailed off as Parker stepped towards him.

Parker scooped up a paintbrush and held it out to him. “Can’t we just paint?” she asked. “I just wanted to paint.”

Hardison took a deep breath. “Yeah. Yeah we can do that.” He pointed at the ceiling. “I am not climbing up there.”

“Nope. I will.” She smiled shyly at him as he bent down to open the cans. “Hardison?” He looked up at her, a questioning look on his face. “Pretzels like painting with you,” she said softly.

“Yeah, yeah, they do,” he agreed in the same tone of voice as she took the can he’d finished opening and carried it away. “And I’m still willing to wait, Parker,” he added. “Still willing.” He surveyed the rest of their supplies and picked another color, staking out a corner to begin painting. It was just another step in the winding road that was Parker.